From what Google and Twitter say it’s Friendship Day and that’s cool. My view on this particular day which was founded in part by Joyce Hall of Hallmark Greeting Cards Company. The criticism is that it’s to sell and exchange greeting cards and other tokens of affection. You know what that would be fine with me. We need more expressions of love, affection and friendship these days.
We live in a mean world that needs softening up. Rediscovering tenderness and friendship is important to give us something to keep us going.
Personally I don’t have a best friend but many people I call friends. Those are people who you share a common view on life, you are there for one another when things get tough and people you can confide in. It’s important they are interested in you as a human being. I am blessed with a good family but there are extended family who I have chosen to be in my life. The one thing is that you hope as you are a good friend to others that they return the favor. Relationships need to be a two-way street to be successful and worth having.
So, Facebook is getting into the dating and relationship game. After the past year they have had isn’t this the very last thing they need to be getting into. Perhaps cleaning up their act should come before anything else. This can’t go wrong, can it?
When you try to do so many things you are not the master of any of it. Stick with what you know.
For more info https://www.reuters.com/article/us-facebook-f8conference/facebook-to-play-cupid-in-online-dating-debut-idUSKBN1I23YV
Getting out of your comfort zone requires stepping out into unchartered territory, meeting people who are different from you and perhaps picking up on the language they speak. I also think it means meeting people half way and being willing to listen and understand. Yeah it can be scary but so rewarding in the end. Growth comes from being challenged.
Tonight we went out for Japanese food and I noticed a group of kids from a local prep school. All of these kids were just out for a meal together and to have some fun. It got me thinking about the squad of friends we have as we go through different parts of life. Friendships come and go through different parts of our lives and along with that the people we hang out with can change. I didn’t have a “squad” really until College where I found the friendships I wanted in junior high and senior high.
As we get older our squad changes in participation, size and meaning. It seems that it gets smaller until we have a circle of friends who become a second family. When you meet your spouse/soul mate then you find yourself wanting to spend more time with one special person. I think we all enjoy friendships but our desires change and our life circumstances bring different people into our lives. Friends are not always friends forever but as some have discussed friends are temporal like life itself.
Even the famous friends above had to find their own way individually and eventually went on to do their own things in their lives. Phoebe, Chandler, Ross, Rachel, Joey, Monica and Ross were tight but they didn’t last in the way we got to know them.
In thinking of that group of friends and school mates I saw tonight it made me think of the future they have ahead of them and the comradary they are establishing. This is a special time in their lives and they should treasure every minute of it. These relationships come only once in ones lives.
Everyone has opinions on things they feel passionately about. It’s also a popular thing to post that opinion on your social feed. Some folks will support and agree with you while others won’t. Certainly there are situations when debate and disagreement has been so strong that it causes friendships to be strained and some to end.
I think everyone should have the freedom to express themselves without being punished for it when it goes contrary to the opinion of others. There are some good people I have had to unfriend/un-follow on Facebook because they consistently and constantly post things that are born from ignorance and intolerance. Yes you might say I am being intolerant too but when someone is so radical and outspoken you just need to free yourself of it.
There are times when losing friendships happens because of your views and what you stand for. Yes it’s sad when you go through that but perhaps it might be for the best. I have to think there will be other people who will step in the gap and become your friend because they value what you have to say and what you believe. A solid friendship will remain despite the differences however if you find that a friend cannot see your point of view then perhaps is that friendship worth preserving ?
Tolerance is a hard thing, understanding is even harder, love is the hardest thing you have to do. Remember you have to be yourself and your opinions matter too.
Today is National Best Friend Day but it’s OK not to have a best friend. My spouse is my friend but not my bestie, that is a different sort of relationship that is way more intimate and special. I have always thought friendships are tough and demanding and in this temporal world we live in there is a lot of life transitions that define what and how long friendship is. I think there is pressure to maintain a platonic partnership like that because of the time and energy it takes. Some tandems have made it work over the years but others have gone their separate ways. It’s OK that I don’t have one. There is no sob story there. It is just the reality of my life.
Call me old fashioned and there are a few things that I am old school about but I believe in respecting ones elders. There are a lot of people who have way more wisdom and life experience than I do so perhaps I can learn something from them. I revere my parents and grandparents however I can still be my own person. In scripture there is a verse that says honor thy father and mother and you do that by being the best you can be as they taught you. Granted you will never agree with them 100% but that is OK. You had different life experiences and your opinions and world view are different which is to be expected.
I do realize there are many who don’t have a positive relationship with their families but there are plenty of older folks in the community who can be a positive influence. Perhaps we can benefit from the experiences of those folks so we won’t make the same mistakes they made. I am 46 years old and I still don’t know it all. Believe me folks I wish I were more like my mom and dad in many ways but I am who I am and that the way God made me.
To some folks I am an elder but that sounds weird. I would rather not be an elder but a friend who has a few more years in me. Perhaps that is the way future older-younger relationships will work.
Wisdom of the ages and youth shall be served, or something like that.
Sometimes when a friend or acquaintance does not respond to your efforts to reach out and communicate it makes you wonder if it was something you did or said to offend. I am a natural born worrier so I am concerned if I screwed up or something along the way. Maybe it’s paranoia or perhaps there is something to it. I can get a little too enthusiastic about my friendships so that can rub some the wrong way. However it takes two to tango as they say. Was it me, or no? It’s all crazy ya know.